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💌 Radical responsibility
Owning your circumstances & getting TF up: moving in edition
Happy July friends, we’ve officially entered the second half of 2023! It felt like just yesterday I was shredding snow on Whistler mountain — now I’m sporting an embarassing watch tan, in the final stages of settling in Toronto.
Today, I want to share the biggest thing I’ve learned from my first two weeks in the 6ix: radical responsibility. In the most “forced radical responsibility” situation I’ve ever been in in my life.
Radical responsibility is defined as taking complete ownership and accountability for one's actions, decisions, and their consequences — going beyond conventional responsibility, with a deep commitment to finding solutions without external blame.
So here’s my situation.
I chose to buy this condo. I hired a realtor and lawyer. I put an offer on this place. I inquired all the fine print in legal documents, and signed them carefully. I liquidated a portion of my investments to reallocate to real estate. I chose to move to Toronto in the first place. Everything was my choice. And I’m radically responsible for all of it.
With the cushion of living at home swept from under my bum, I was confronted with things I had to find a solution to. (And I’m thankful every day for my roommate Andrew, a companion to do it all with.)
Broken door knob? Screw it back on tight or buy a new one. Don’t like the kitchen backdrop? Research budget-friendly ways to replace it. Previous owner left the oven a mess? Buy some oven cleaner, get on your knees (literally), and get to work. Hungry af? Buy some groceries, pots, and spatulas, and get cooking. Mortgage, condo fees, wifi, hydro, condo insurance, and property tax all coming out of my paycheck?! Time for a seriously radical reevaluation of my finances and spending.
To say I haven’t had a few migraines is a lie. But not once did I ever complain. The response to any challenge, be it an unexpected problem or strides toward a goal, is by simply taking informed action.
Adulting is coming to peace with the fact it’s not always sunshines and rainbows. It’s navigating complexity with a drive to keep on learning, because nobody else should do it for you. Adulting is practicing nuanced life skills that school never taught us — in real-life cases with real-life stakes, without an instruction manual. It’s making the best of your situation, knowing darn well it’s a situation only you can influence for yourself.
It’s, quite literally, creating your own reality with the raw materials around you — but with all the unsexy parts, like Googling legal terminology, locating missing screws, and trying airfryer recipes totally on a whim. (Okay, the last one is pretty sexy.)
Despite the headaches and seemingly endless work, I’m reaching the light at the end of the tunnel, though the “living on my own” part is only just beginning. And, despite the stress involved, it’s a load of fun — it’s all part of the process anyway, so why not make it a blast?
Radical responsibility is the most self-empowering thing, growing with it confidence, newfound skills, and mental grit you didn’t know you had. It shows up not just in moving out, but anywhere you want — like running your own business. Taking care of a loved one. Making a career jump. Or radically transforming your life in any which way.
Wherever you land, you’ll be able to pat yourself on the back — you got yourself there. It’s all you. Own it.
I hope this lit a fire under your ass. Let’s take the rest of 2023 by the reigns.
With tough love,
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Quote I’m pondering:
"Awakening is not changing who you are, but discarding who you are not." —Deepak Chopra
Raw life update:
Just returning to Toronto from a little weekend trip with my parents, exploring Ottawa, Montreal, and Quebec! My heart is SO FULL for the quality time I get to spend with my wonderful mom and dad. I feel blessed for them, every single day. <3
Excited to finalize the finishing touches of my condo: staining the wooden dining table, getting some art pieces, mailing back the returns, a final (like, actually tho!) garbage run.
Gearing up for routine again. I reimagined my ideal morning routine in Toronto, and am so excited to put it into practice. Woohoo!
Launched another podcast episode — check it out below!
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